A business and a new baby : My experience as a founder

I don’t think anyone really knows what to expect when becoming a mum for the first time. Everyone who already is a parent tells you to make the most of your last few months without a baby (which is pretty much impossible when you’re a mix of way too excited and you can’t really do anything like you used to because of pregnancy).

When I found out I was pregnant, I remember frantically searching online for women’s experiences of having a baby who have their own business (the mum, not the baby). I got overwhelmed by hearing people talk about the way in which having a baby meant you lose your own identity and just become a mum, it scared me to think that this change was just going to come over me and I wouldn’t be Ella anymore. Then I began to look into maternity leave and think about how that would look for me with a business that was only just turning two years old. 75% of mums in the UK take the 39 weeks of maternity leave (Parental Rights Survey 2019), but as the only full time employee of my business, if I took 39 weeks of maternity leave I would have no work to come back to at the end of it, my business just would not survive all that time without me.

When Pablo was born, I completely understood what everyone had said about feeling that you lose your identity. The only way I can describe the first few weeks is like going into survival mode, but survival for the baby, you’re just there to keep them alive. I think the major shift is that when you become a parent, you’re never your first thought, it’s always the baby first, and then you. As time goes on, things do seem to get a bit easier, you’re not in that daze of birth recovery, and you learn more about your baby and what they need. There are new challenges, but I think you get better at dealing with them. And for me, once I could get out and about, and especially join my mum and baby gym class and be active somewhere I could take Pablo with me I started to feel more like myself, just a different version of myself: Ella 2.0 (without much sleep).

I pretty much stuck to my plan to take about 4 months off work, which handily coincided with the end of school term and summer holidays, so it’s naturally a quieter time for my business anyway. During that time off, I had to keep up with a bare minimum of tasks which are legal requirements (things like accounts and stuff) and I had some Keeping In Touch days I could use for other tasks and prep for the new year, but I really did have a proper break. I needed that time to spend with Pablo and my little family and I loved it.

I knew that by September I needed to be get back into work again because the start of the new school term meant the start of new programmes for Our Goal. I’ve been back at work for a month now, and to be totally honest, have found it really difficult finding time to work from home with Pablo, mostly because whenever he is awake I want to be present and with him, not on my laptop. So I’m currently finding time to work around his schedule (really early, really late, and during his very short naps!) and with a LOT of help from my husband and parents. But one thing which I really didn’t anticipate would play such a big part in having a baby and business at the same time was the impact of breastfeeding. Being solely breastfed, I am Pablo’s only source of food, or his ‘Maquina de leche’ / milk machine as we call it at home. He is a very hungry baby and eats very regularly, which means that we have to be together pretty much all the time. But this means that I’m at this stage in new mum life where I’m trying to juggle working and having a baby with me.

Pablo has been very busy with mummy, we’ve spoken on a panel at a local Council event, we’ve delivered a talk at a Women’s Institute, we’ve spoken at a University, and we’ve had lots of meetings. I still never really know whether I need to tell people I’ll be attending with a baby. I tend not to because I don’t want to give the wrong impression, for them to think I am unprofessional or not taking the event seriously. I think we don’t really see women in a professional context with their babies because by the time most return to work, their babies are in nursery or old enough to eat solids so don’t need to be with mum 24/7.

I’m so privileged to work with partners and people who are supportive of Pablo being around, and I know that is not the case for everyone. I can’t say it’s stress-free taking my 5 month old baby out to work meetings, but it is what works for us now.

• Pablo gets to be with me (and his food), and he gets to meet new people and see new places

• I get to continue to run my business, make a living, and make an impact through Our Goal CIC's work.

Running a small business with a new baby is tiring and stressful, but all of that is outweighed by the fact it means I get to spend more precious time with my baby, and on top of that, I feel passionate about being a visible new mum in business making things work with a baby at my meetings!